men rule

At last> a guy has taken the time to write this all down Finally, the guys' side of the story.> (I must admit, it's pretty good.)> We always hear "the rules"> From the female side.> Now here are the rules from the male side.> These are our rules!> Please note.. these are all> numbered "1"> ON PURPOSE!> 1. Men ARE not mind readers.> > 1. Learn to work the toilet seat.> You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.> We need it up, you need it down.> You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.> > 1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon> or the changing of the tides.> Let it be.> > 1.> Shopping is NOT a sport.> And no, we are never going to think of it that way.> > 1. Crying is> blackmail.> > 1. Ask for what you want.> Let us be clear on this one:> Subtle hints do not work!> Strong hints do not work!> Obvious hints do not work!> Just say it!> > color=red size=7>> 1. Yes and No are> perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every question.> > 1. Come to us> with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's what we do.> Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.> > 1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a color=red size=7> problem. See a doctor.> > 1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.> In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.> > 1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret> girls, don't Expect us to act like soap opera guys.> > 1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.> Don't ask us.> > 1. If something we said can be interpreted> two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one> > 1. You can either ask us to do> something> Or tell us how you want it done.> Not both.> If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.> > 1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.> > 1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.> > 1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows> default settings.> Peach, for example, is a fruit, not! A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.> > 1. If it itches, it will Be scratched.> We do> that.> > 1. If we ask what is> wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.> We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.> > 1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.> > 1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is fine... Really.> > 1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation,> or golf.> > 1. You have enough clothes.> > 1. You have too many> shoes.> > 1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!> > 1. Thank you for reading this.> Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; but did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.>